I took this blog offline for a while and I’ve deleted a lot of the posts that don’t make sense being here, but I still feel the need to write. I look back over my writing and my life and see and feel where I was at the time.
In this life I’ve experienced a lot of pain, heartache, and disappointment. But I’ve also loved, and been loved in return. That’s probably the one thing in life that I value most. Being loved, and loving others, is really the only thing that I find has any lasting value. Even if friendships fade, the memories are something I treasure. Someone recently said to me:
“I loved reading your story. You have had a lot more passionate romance in your life than I have.”
I never really considered it before, but it’s true. I’ve had some really painful times of late but as much as I’ve been hurting, I don’t regret the love and the passion. I can honestly say if I died tomorrow, I’d be happy with the life I’ve lived. I’ve been in very low places, but the question always comes back to
“do I want to walk into oblivion, to rid myself of this pain?”
The answer has been a consistent no. So I march forward. I know where I’ve been, but I’m not sure where the future will take me. But I’m grateful for today, for now, for this.